Sunday, August 28, 2011

Goodness I have no idea where to begin.

Thursday at work was hell on wheels. Backstory, I do home health with 2 guys in one apartment. One guy is super quiet, needs minimal assistance. Just perfect. The other guy is very very agitated constantly, Always worrying about who's coming in that night, going next door (they take him to another apartment when they have to take guy #1 to the doctor. he HATES it, yet they still do it). So Thursday they took guy #1 to the doctor and guy #2 went next door. Of course when I got in at 2pm, he was wound up from that. I managed to semi calm him for my shift. Later that night, he was at it again. I tried to redirect him to something else. He wasn't having it. He began screaming. LOUDLY.  He got violent with himself. Hitting himself in the head. I called my team leader and ask basically, "The fuck do I do????" I've never dealt with that before. According to them, it's a common thing with him :look But he's never attacked staff.

Last night was 10 times worse then Thursday. Same shit happened. This time he was even more violent with him self. Had 3 different instances where he attacked himself in the head about 5-10 times. I freaked out and called my team leader in tears. I hid in the bathroom while he went about the apartment screaming. Blood curdling screams. I texted J until my team leader got there and tried to calm down. After my shift, I talked with the team leader and told her what happened. She said she'd speak to the administrator about it and see if there's anything they can do about it. He's already heavily medicated (Lithium, Klonopin, and other antipsychotics).

If this keeps up, I don't know how much longer I can work with them if they don't move me. I can't just sit there an watch him do that and pray he doesn't come at me.

*whew* I feel better.

Sunday, August 7, 2011

I ordered these  off eBay when I was in TN and it took them a little
over 3 weeks to get to me. Darn China! 

I've needed these nails wheels since I started collecting different polishes. 
I currently have 75 color polishes. 

And my wishlist is continuing to get longer.

Friday, August 5, 2011

This person has been so amazing to me. I can't thank God enough
for blessing me with a wonderful husband 
and an awesome father to our daughter.

Thursday, August 4, 2011


For a while, I hated seeing pink. Then I got a little older and begin loving it.
I have pink everywhere.
My insulin pump is pink. My mouse & mousepad is pink. The list goes on.
I have more pink polishes than I can count. However this one is my favorite.

I looked everywhere for this shade of hot pink and found it on clearance at Target. It's Revlon's Candy.

Wednesday, August 3, 2011

There weren't many clouds out today but I managed to find these.

Monday, August 1, 2011

So I've been wanting to do a photo challenge for a while now. So here goes!

I haven't blogged in forever so hopefully this will get me back into it. Plus, I'm trying to learn more about photography as a HOBBY only. I'm not even trying to be a professional or charge people. With that being said, here we go! 

This pic was taken with my phone but I love it

Monday, April 4, 2011

Meet Mark.

There is a lady by the name of Tia that I met here at Fort Lewis over a year ago. I actually met her on Twitter before I PCS'd here. I've grown to know and love her over this past year. She's truly an amazing friend, mother, and wife.  Recently she's started blogging at and selling Mark.

She invited me to come to a meeting that she was attending with her mentor. After seeing everything they had to offer, I was sold.

I am officially a Mark. representative. The products are very affordable, the start up cost is low, and the products are not tested on animals.

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

New adventure

I haven't blogged in a while but I figured I better post a short one.

Things have been pretty calm and less hectic. We worked hard after my husband got home from his last deployment to save and get him a car. So I have been getting out and visiting friends more and just being able to get up and go without coordinating with his crazy work schedule.

I have also branched into a new adventure thanks to a fellow good friend. I'm not ready to say what it is just yet. Once I have everything in my hands, I will definitely tell what it is. I'm excited and a little nervous cause it's something new that I've never done before. My husband is supporting me 100% and I can't thank him enough.

Until next time....

Monday, February 14, 2011


So much for doing things for me. I've been wanting to go to Zumba class forever. I haven't made it to one in two months. It's at 1630 and J gets off at random times. This whole one car issue is really getting to me.Yet, I don't think we can swing two car payments plus insurance and still have money for other things. J thinks we can but I digress.

Anyways. I've been a ball of mess.. I'm not sure what's going on with my emotions but they are out of control. Everything and almost everyone gets on my nerves. I'm always quiet so I don't snap or go off on anybody. I haven't checked my sugar in days.
I had an infusion set on for 5 days straight when it's only supposed to be on for 3. McKenzie's room is a mess because someone (not me) let her eat popcorn in her room and she turned the bowl over. It's been there for days and I don't care about picking it up when I specifically said I didn't want her eating in her room.

Yesterday, J wanted to go and look at houses. I didn't. I told him before he took his nap (must be nice) that I had to wash McKenzie's hair and I wanted to flat iron mine.  It took me two hours on McKenzie's hair and I had no energy to do mine.

Today, I had planned on going the the commissary and Target. Nothing special, I just wanted to get out the house. He gets home at 0800 for PT and asks if I'm going cause he has to pick up 2 people before he heads to work. So I start to get myself AND McKenzie ready so *I* can put the carseats in the truck and arrange it so he can pick up whoever. So I just say fuck it cause I'm in a pissy mood cause *I* am the one rushing to get us all ready and out the door by 0845. Then he starts on how if I knew I wanted to go then I should've been ready to begin with. Really? Maybe if I had some help to do some things, then we could be ready in time.

I'm just so frustrated with trying to do everything and make sure we're out the door on time so he won't be late. Wednesday, I have a counseling session at 0900 and I'm trying to figure out how I'm going to get Kenzie to daycare and him to work and me to the appointment.

I'm just so tired of feeling defeated.

Sunday, January 23, 2011

Back in the rut

It's been so long since I've blogged, it's ridiculous. But I said I would try to get back into blogging and getting things off my chest.

I'm stuck back in this rut and I have no idea how to get out of it completely. I'll go in it, come out for a week or two, and then somehow get back in it again. So weird and crazy. 

Tonight, McKenzie didn't take a nap until 17:00 after she had an early dinner. Now she's up and weird. My husband decides he's going to sleep at 20:00. Guess who gets to stay up with the munchkin? That's right. Little ole me. Unfortunately, I'm used to this happening. However, just because I'm used to it doesn't mean I wouldn't like a break.

For instance, today we ordered pizza for dinner. I went, alone mind you, to get it. I also went to the Dodge dealer and looked at the 2011 Dodge Durangos, which are super sexy. I digress. ANYWAYS, I get a text asking, "Where are you? McKenzie keeps asking for you." Really? She asks for her daddy every morning she wakes up and he's gone to work. Guess who deals with that? Yep, me. While my husband was watching the football game, I brought my MacBook to the couch and browsed for free eBooks. However, I couldn't have any silence without someone calling my name or mentioning something or another.

It's just frustrating. I barely can bathe in peace. Forget about taking an actual bath and getting to soak for 30 minutes or an hour. I don't get a day off. I don't get a sick day. I don't get vacation. Sometimes, actually, all the time, I wish I worked a regualr job so I could have a reason to relax on the couch, do limited to no housework, and still take care of a child.

Somedays I don't even want to think straight. Let alone run this house.

What I would give for 48 hours of complete and utter silence.